Matthew

 

My prayer for you...

May you never lose your smile or joy in the simple things

May your laughter never be muted

May you never allow anyone to silence your God given personality 

May you never trade in your uniqueness for something ordinary 

May you never believe the lie that you need to fit in or be like somebody else
May you never replace your hugs and affection with walls

May you never use your words to hurt others

May you always be quick to forgive and quick to repent

May you never use your positions in life to control others but to lead with love

May you have a strong yet tender heart

May you know when to turn the other cheek and when it is your place to protect

May your spirit be sensitive to the voice of the Father

May you walk in the wisdom of God and not the wisdom of man

May you always have discernment with people and choices you face

May you have a hunger for God’s Word all the days of your life

May you be a fervent man of prayer

May you have a heart for the unsaved, the broken, and the hurting

May you never be judgmental or prejudice, but love people as God does

May you discover and walk out the work that you have been called to do

May you never doubt Jesus’ love for you

 And may you always stay on the path that leads to life…

 

 

Happy 9^th Birthday, Matthew – a boy that I adore – a boy that has changed my life J

I love you and am proud of you,

Mom

Fulfilling Your Spouse

 

We all have our ideals of what we want to GET out of our marriages, but what are we willing to GIVE?  Laying aside our desires for just a moment, let’s think about our spouses. What could we do to assure them they are loved? What would make them feel safe, secure, and truly cared about?  We all have an innate need for these things. What are we doing to daily fulfill it for our partner? 

 

Some of us the yearning and need is even greater because of things we have gone through in life; possibly rejection and abandonment wounds that yes, only the love of the Father can heal, but what if we could play a part in binding up those wounds in our mate as the Father lavishes His love upon them through us?  What if? 

Our relationship with our spouse is to be the most intimate of all relationships we have.  We are neglecting the responsibility given to us when we fail to invest in learning how and applying a level of love to our spouse that is to trump all other earthly relationships they have.  Easier said than done?  Yes.  A lot of denying our own selfish desires and attitudes for the sake of them?  Yes.  Choosing to love them in word and action even when we feel justified in not doing so?  Yes.  We are the closest “skin” God can use to love His child and demonstrate His unconditional love for them.  

It truly is more blessed to give than to receive. To have the privilege to make someone feel special, and to make their life a little easier is priceless.  Wives, wouldn't it bring you unspeakable joy to know that when your husband leaves the house each day, he longs to get home to YOU?  Husbands, can you imagine the “spring” you’d have in your step in knowing your wife excitedly anticipates your return home? 

 
When we just take life as it comes, all too often we set ourselves up for failure. This is true in our homes as well.  We can say we want to have a healthy and happy home, but wanting and doing are two different things.  Good relationships don’t just happen.  To get good at anything there is practice, repetition, and dedication. 

 

Have you ever thought about writing down your goal as a spouse?   When you are making plans for the day with things you wish to accomplish, once you make a checklist of those things, you feel obligated or accountable to do that which you have set in your heart to do.  Likewise, when you get specific as to the spouse you want to be, you are more apt to take the steps to becoming just that.  Then share it with your spouse.  What a beautiful moment you will bring to them when they see your heart’s desire is to bring them joy!

 

How does this sound?        

 

As your lifetime best friend, I want to bring you joy
A place of safety where you can be vulnerable
I want to hold your hand as an encourager, your biggest fan
As your faithful lover, I want to make you feel like the man (woman) you are

I commit to talking things through, never allowing walls to be built up
I will protect your feelings even if I do not agree or understand
I will always do my best to show you how much you’re loved
I want you to never doubt how proud I am that you are mine

I want our home to be a peaceful haven
A place you can retreat to - to be refreshed from each day’s challenges
I want to make you feel alive; adding smiles to your life
Whatever it is I can do, I want to make life easier for you

This is possible, but we have to throw out the 50/50, self seeking mindset “I’ll do for you if you do for me.”  Marriage is teamwork. What team ever succeeded with players only giving 50 percent?  Marriage takes commitment and it is a commitment far beyond staying faithful. 
 

100/100 carries a whole different perspective: to solely seek to satisfy your partner’s needs.   If we want a truly fulfilling marriage, both sides have to give their all. As I tell my children, you are responsible for YOUR actions.  You can’t use someone else’s “shortcuts” as an excuse to not do your best.  I find the things I teach the kids to be sound truth and healthy relationship advice. Ha.  It’s time we as adults start living by the same rule.  If our spouse is having a less than 100% kind of day, guess what?  We aim our own behavior on God’s standards not on the weakness our spouse is having at the moment. J

Let’s make the decision today to be passionate about fulfilling our spouse.  Ask the Lord to put that desire in you if it is currently clouded by negative emotions.  Begin seeing your spouse as a gift of great worth laid in your hands from the Father Himself.  What will you do with this treasure?  Will you protect it from the danger of outside elements?  Will you carefully handle and nurture it in such a way that you yourself do not cause it damage?  This gift given to you will one day be given back to the Giver Himself.  Will your spouse be returned in greater spiritual and emotional condition than upon the day you received them?  I believe that is our mandate as husband, as wife.  May each of us bring glory to God as we purposefully take care of this "gift" of great value!

Fulfilling Your Spouse

 

 

We all have our ideals of what we want to GET out of our marriages, but what are we willing to GIVE?  Laying aside our desires for just a moment, let’s think about our spouses. What could we do to assure them they are loved? What would make them feel safe, secure, and truly cared about?  We all have an innate need for these things. What are we doing to daily fulfill it for our partner? 

 

Some of us the yearning and need is even greater because of things we have gone through in life; possibly rejection and abandonment wounds that yes, only the love of the Father can heal, but what if we could play a part in binding up those wounds in our mate as the Father lavishes His love upon them through us?  What if? 

Our relationship with our spouse is to be the most intimate of all relationships we have.  We are neglecting the responsibility given to us when we fail to invest in learning how and applying a level of love to our spouse that is to trump all other earthly relationships they have.  Easier said than done?  Yes.  A lot of denying our own selfish desires and attitudes for the sake of them?  Yes.  Choosing to love them in word and action even when we feel justified in not doing so?  Yes.  We are the closest “skin” God can use to love His child and demonstrate His unconditional love for them.  

It truly is more blessed to give than to receive. To have the privilege to make someone feel special, and to make their life a little easier is priceless.  Wives, wouldn't it bring you unspeakable joy to know that when your husband leaves the house each day, he longs to get home to YOU?  Husbands, can you imagine the “spring” you’d have in your step in knowing your wife excitedly anticipates your return home? 

 
When we just take life as it comes, all too often we set ourselves up for failure. This is true in our homes as well.  We can say we want to have a healthy and happy home, but wanting and doing are two different things.  Good relationships don’t just happen.  To get good at anything there is practice, repetition, and dedication. 

 

Have you ever thought about writing down your goal as a spouse?   When you are making plans for the day with things you wish to accomplish, once you make a checklist of those things, you feel obligated or accountable to do that which you have set in your heart to do.  Likewise, when you get specific as to the spouse you want to be, you are more apt to take the steps to becoming just that.  Then share it with your spouse.  What a beautiful moment you will bring to them when they see your heart’s desire is to bring them joy!

 

How does this sound?        

 

As your lifetime best friend, I want to bring you joy
A place of safety where you can be vulnerable
I want to hold your hand as an encourager, your biggest fan
As your faithful lover, I want to make you feel like the man (woman) you are

I commit to talking things through, never allowing walls to be built up
I will protect your feelings even if I do not agree or understand
I will always do my best to show you how much you’re loved
I want you to never doubt how proud I am that you are mine

I want our home to be a peaceful haven
A place you can retreat to - to be refreshed from each day’s challenges
I want to make you feel alive; adding smiles to your life
Whatever it is I can do, I want to make life easier for you

This is possible, but we have to throw out the 50/50, self seeking mindset “I’ll do for you if you do for me.”  Marriage is teamwork. What team ever succeeded with players only giving 50 percent?  Marriage takes commitment and it is a commitment far beyond staying faithful. 
 

100/100 carries a whole different perspective: to solely seek to satisfy your partner’s needs.   If we want a truly fulfilling marriage, both sides have to give their all. As I tell my children, you are responsible for YOUR actions.  You can’t use someone else’s “shortcuts” as an excuse to not do your best.  I find the things I teach the kids to be sound truth and healthy relationship advice. Ha.  It’s time we as adults start living by the same rule.  If our spouse is having a less than 100% kind of day, guess what?  We aim our own behavior on God’s standards not on the weakness our spouse is having at the moment. J

Let’s make the decision today to be passionate about fulfilling our spouse.  Ask the Lord to put that desire in you if it is currently clouded by negative emotions.  Begin seeing your spouse as a gift of great worth laid in your hands from the Father Himself.  What will you do with this treasure?  Will you protect it from the danger of outside elements?  Will you carefully handle and nurture it in such a way that you yourself do not cause it damage?  This gift given to you will one day be given back to the Giver Himself.  Will your spouse be returned in greater spiritual and emotional condition than upon the day you received them?  I believe that is our mandate as husband, as wife.  May each of us bring glory to God as we purposefully take care of this "gift" of great value!

 

Open Our Eyes

Suicides.  Drug overdose.  Addiction. 

 

Almost a year ago I remember hearing of the suicide of a 14 year old local boy.  My heart became heavy.  I believe we have become too accustomed to thinking "what you see is what you get." We take things for face value. We see a smile, we assume someone is happy.  We hear someone laugh and we assume they have joy.  This young boy was known for being friendly, helpful, and always having a smile on his face. Behind that uncracked smile was a heart that was broken.  People say that there were no signs... they judged the book by its cover and now all that is left are questions with no answers.

Tragic.

As Christians, we have been given spiritual vision. Discernment.  It is an ability to distinguish between truth and error; good and evil. It's the ability to see "behind the scenes." It's seeing through God's eyes. 

 

"God would surely have known it, for He knows the secrets of every heart." Psalm 44:21

 

You may read this Scripture and think Of course God knows all things because He is God.  When we became Christ followers, we were given the mind of Christ. As we fervently study the Word and press into prayer - we will come to know the heart of God at a whole new level.  We too can see like Him.

 

"For, "Who can know the Lord's thoughts? ...But we understand these things, for we have the mind of Christ." 1 Corinthians 2:16

We are the body of Christ in the earth. Because we are called to be His hands, His feet, His voice - He equipped us with exactly what we need in order to do so: the Holy Spirit! The Holy Spirit is our Guide. He will show us things. He will deposit things within us that are the very words to unlock a hardened heart. He will give us the key to exposing the pain of a "what seems to be" happy person. He will show us things to come in order to protect us and protect others.  He will give us different strategies to reach the unsaved.  He will keep us well informed if we will just listen.

"However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come." John 16:13 

We just need to be yielded people. A people who are hungry to hear. A people who want to bring the will of Heaven to earth.  A people ready and willing at all times to be used to touch lives that Jesus said were worth dying for. Let's not drop the ball...

 

Lord, we pray that You would open our eyes into the unseen realms, open our eyes to see past the natural into the spiritual.  We pray for discernment. We pray that we wouldn't see as man sees, but that our vision would be through Your eyes. We want to touch lives. We want to save lives.  We don't ever want to miss an opportunity, a life that You want to touch through us.  We yield ourselves for Your use, Father...

Help us be a people of compassion, a people sold out to the cause of reaching others with the hope of Your Good News!  Be the words on our lips, Lord. We pray You would give us words of knowledge and words of wisdom so that we can have a word in due season for those, who like this young boy, are on the brink of giving up.

We also lift up the family and friends of those who have lost lost someone to  suicide or addiction... We pray for comfort and we pray for true peace that only comes through You.  We pray laborers would rise up during this time to reach out to the family and friends who are grieving.  May good come out of this tragedy by the lives that will be won for You.

In Jesus' Name. Amen.

Spills

"I need ALL of you" I heard the Lord speak.  ALL of me. He wants the good, the bad, and the ugly.  He wants the things I am ashamed of. He wants the pains, the struggles, the frustrations, the questions. ALL. 

Notice He didn't say He "wants." Though He does want all of us, in order to work in us, He NEEDS our cooperation.

We have to quit shoving things under the rug with God.  It's impossible to love Him with all of our heart, mind, soul, body, and strength - as we claim we do, if we don't give Him all of it.  Just as an earthly relationship with secrets, it's those very things that destroy the intimacy and damage the relationship.  We need to expose to Him the things He already sees - which in turn grants Him permission to heal, mend, and adjust our mindsets so we can be all we are called to be in Him.

Anything unrevealed will not be healed; will not be cleaned or made whole. If I spill something on the floor and leave it undealt with or carelessly spot clean, the damage remains.  It may be visible damage or it may be damage that is only seen when the carpet is removed.  In order to restore or fix the "spills" in our lives, we have to confront them head on by allowing God in. We must allow Him to shine His healing presence on the condition.  When our "free will" chooses to let God in, He then has something to work with. 

Upon opening the door to Him in ALL areas, we then need to trust Him. Trust Him that whatever He tells us is for our benefit and the benefit of others. Trust Him that even if what He tells us is painful at the moment, it's always for our greater good.  He may require you to rip out the carpet to get to the spill.  You may be, along with God, restoring the floor. Not an easy task. Not a joy ride... but His purpose is always greater... It's always to get you to the other side - to the side of His will - because He knows that it is in His perfect will, in His presence, joy and fulfillment are found.

I challenge you to surrender your ALL. Expect Him to do some rearranging because He will.  His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts... He won't always do what we are comfortable with. The process isn't always a quick work because anything rushed is rarely done well.

Quiet yourself. Wait on Him. His voice is calling out, "Give Me ALL of you."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LcyQOLVS_U

(Matthew 22:37, Isaiah 55:9, Psalm 16:11, Psalm 139:23, Psalm 51:10-12, Isaiah 53:4-5, Psalm 30:11, Jeremiah 29:11, Jeremiah 18:4)